URN 00001 · Shelley · Tearoom
Dearne Lea Tea Room
Requires improvement
They have heard of custard. They have not yet understood it.
Composite
5.8
Inspections
1
Last inspected
2026-10-04
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The six tests
- Yellowness9/10Beige crimeHazard yellow
- Viscosity8/10Yellow waterCoat the spoon
- Quantity7/10A rumourBottomless
- Temperature7/10Fridge-coldProperly hot
- The skin4/10Stirred to deathUnbroken
- The jug0/10ThimbleLeft on the table
Inspection mark
They may still download it. We would not.
INSPECTION MARK. Available as a mark, should they develop a sense of humour.
Footer size
Inspection reports
- Requires improvement
2026-10-04 · Field Inspector
Requires improvement5.8
“Dearne Lea sent out a warm yellow lake that refused to run back together, leaving a polite gap behind the pie. Thick, only a slight skin, and no jug in the building. Close to good, and not quite.”